All Hail the Wonderful Slowey...and Glen

So it's been a few wonderful nights in Twins land. The Twins are on an amazing winning streak, our starting pitchers have been amazing (well Glen wasn't entirely amazing, but he got a win, so it's redeemable.)

I would like to take credit for Brendan Harris' hitting (extra bases) streak that he's on right now. It started right around the time that I almost spilt the beer on him, and since then he's just been on a roll! Two home runs and a bunch of hits. I think he totally owes me for that. :)

You're welcome Brendan. You can repay me later.

I was loving watching Kevin Slowey on Tuesday night against the Padres. He did great and had a shutout going...and then Jesse Crain came in and tied the game up, just to destroy Kevin Slowey getting the win. I think he was conspiring against Kevin, and I might be fighting with Jesse now...I haven't decided yet. It's a good thing that Brendan could pull through for us and hit the ball over the fence (in what Bert and Dick constantly referred to as the "pitchers ballpark"). I was also amazed that Craig Monroe hit a homerun last night...he always shocks me when he gets hits, because they are few and far between. The tendancy for him to hit the ball when I'm NOT watching is ALWAYS likely. I don't think Monroe likes me very well, but that's okay, I'm not his biggest fan either.

I thought it was super cool when I saw my friend flash across the screen right after the commercial break at the top of the 5th inning on Tuesday's game. Her sign for circling, and then Bert circling her. It's fun to see your friends on TV when they are in another state. Especially when they are where you would rather be. She got Craig Breslow to notice the sign that she brought for him, and then Go-Gomez and Casilla to notice the one she made for them.

An Off-Day

I figured I'd share in some ridiculous fun while the Twins had an off day yesterday. Tonight: Kevin Slowey against Jake Peavey IN beautiful San Diego. Petco Park is amazing, and I just want everyone to know that I love San Diego. I don't want the Padres to win tonight, believe me (and I won't even wear my Padres hat, even though I do own one). I may like Peavy, San Deigo, Petco park, and all other things "San Diego" but GO TWINS!!!
Now, for the pictures... (captions below)

I freaking love this picture! It's SO cute! But I'm sorry to say, Cole is not as cute as his daddy!
Me and my friend at Wednesday game. Enjoying the Navy jerseys. This was our "true fan photo", since I won't let them take a picture of me any other way...
Kevin, do this again tonight!! I like cheering loudly for you when you bat!

In other semi-Twins related news...Juan Rincon signed a minor-league deal with the Cleveland Indians. So he'll be seeing his old teammate Jason Tyner, and in essence it's like we got Craig Breslow for Juan Rincon. Couldn't have asked for a better "trade". I enjoy Breslow WAY better than Rincon. Say "hi" to Tyner for us, Juannie!

Brushes and Brooms...Unplugged

After a nice long weekend for myself, two Twins games, and a Baseball Unplugged later, I am back with pictures and a story. I have discovered (after asking), that the starting pitcher gets to pick which jersey they wear (which is what I thought). Glen Perkins convinced Kevin Slowey to wear the Navy jerseys. (note to Glen Perkins: THANKS!! I owe you one.) I was having a crappy day on Wednesday...God decided to give me, Kevin Slowey pitching (with a win) and Kevin Slowey in the Navy jersey. That night could not have gotten any better, unless Kevin would have been following me home after the game was over.

Well, Thursday night included me going to Baseball Unplugged, which usually Michael Cuddyer hosts this event, he was not there, Mike Redmond was "subbing" for him. I am going to say this, and some may not like it, including Mr. Cuddyer. I like Mike Redmond better as a host. He's funny, and he tells us stories about how Joe Mauer is a rapper. (Joe has a program on his Mac where you can make songs...Kevin made fun of him that he chose to do a rap song rather than anything else...and also said that Joe had to buy the microphone in order to record, which Joe claims he already had the mic.) Cuddy, you're going to have A LOT to live up to for the next Unplugged...

THINGS MRS. SLOWEY ENJOYED AT UNPLUGGED:

1. Kevin Slowey, enough said.
2. Finding out Joe Mauer is a rapper.
3. Almost getting to hear Joe Mauer rap.
4. Kevin Slowey picking on Joe Mauer ridiculously.
5. Listening to Joe Mauer, Mike Redmond, Kevin Slowey, and Matt Tolbert sing "Happy Birthday"...badly, I might add.
6. Getting a snipet of "Happy Birthday" on video.
7. Finding out Kevin Slowey and Matt Tolbert are single.
8. Finding out Kevin Slowey doesn't live with Glen anymore, but now lives with Matt Tolbert.
9. Getting free tickets.
10. Extra guests at Unplugged...ie. Matt Tolbert, and Brendan Harris
11. Being remembered by players.
12. Ridiculous fun!

Okay, now onto my klutz moment story:

Once upon a time at a Baseball Unplugged, this girl, we'll call her Ava, realized that there were extra beautiful baseball players that were in attendance and wanted to get a picture with them. (even though she already had one with one of the players)...after getting her autograph from the man she loved, the man who loved her, and the host, she went over to Mr. Matt Tolbert. She asked for her picture and he agreed without hesitation. Well just as Ava's friend was ready to snap the picture, this girl's elbow bumped into the beer on the ledge. Before she could stop it, it was on it's way tumbling down, trying to spill it's contents ALL over the wonderful Brendan Harris. Ava was thankful that Brendan had such cat-like reflexes and jumped out of the way. She tried to appologize (after being told she had committed a "party foul" even though she wasn't at a party per se.) he waived her off, telling her it was okay and it wasn't even his. Brendan said "it's his" and points to Matt Tolbert. Ava's face flushed from embarrassment and her lack of grace, and turned to Mr. Tolbert. She said, "Matt Tolbert, I'm SO sorry, can I buy you another beer?" She hoped he would forgive her...after all, she did like him better after meeting him than she had before that night. He responded, "it's alright," with a wink, "I'll just go get another one."
She realized it was okay, even though she was still a little embarrassed, but walked away knowing he'd remember her klutzy-ness the next time they met.

The End.

Haha...okay, so I am cheesy, but I am making up for it now with some pictures from Unplugged, and pictures from Wednesday's game. Enjoy (captions are under the pictures)!

Mr. Matt Tolbert and I at Unplugged.
Kevin Slowey looking cute as ever at Baseball Unplugged
Mike Redmond "the host" at Unplugged.
Joe with glasses and scruff at Unplugged...
Brendan Harris enjoying Unplugged... :) he wasn't scheduled to be there, but it was alright with me that he was!
Um, Boys...it's not okay to scratch your butts!!
Mr. Mauer

I swear I was taking a picture of his batting glove...his ass just got in the way! He's pretty, even though he's engaged. Joe, catching the ball...lol...I just tried to get a picture of him snuggling with Kevin...
Got three of my boys...

Go-Gomez running backwards...apparently I can get him running backwards, but not forward...

Kevin...and his leg bending in very awkward ways!

Cristian Guzman
Brian Buscher...I'm uncomfortable with you doing that! Justin..."steping up to the plate!"

Brendan Harris, "pulling a Jason"...lolGo-Gomez defying gravity...

klutz moments, but funny stories!

Okay, so tonight was baseball unplugged. Scheduled guests: Mike Redmond, Joe Mauer, and Kevin Slowey. Loved it. Then, when it started, they told everyone how Matt Tolbert was there, and then Brendan Harris walked in a little later. I was on cloud nine. Well I'll just say this for now, with pictures and more of the story to come later, I spilled Matt Tolbert's beer...and it was almost on Brendan Harris.

Ponder this until Monday!

And Then They Rested...Picking on the Ho-Ho

I sometimes hate "off-days". They leave me starving for good sporting news. I haven't gotten much news on the Wild, so nothing in the paper today really thrilled me. I'm not going to lie, reading about Delmon Young and his brother coming into town, wasn't really a "page-turner" in my mind.
So in my boredom, I decided to go back to old Twins galleries ('06 and '07) using my wonderful "Twins Territory Team" Membership. I found some funny pictures...and some I just made funny with my amazing sense of humor. (Captions are underneath)Joe is a little camera shy at his American Idol audition.


I always knew Lew Ford was "special". Be sure to read the caption, it says "Twins outfielder Lew Ford poses with a group raising funds for Special Olympics..."...Doesn't Lew fit in well? (yes, I know I'm mean...I really did like Lew Ford!)

This was always humorous to me. Ahh, Justin...such a sense of humor.


Alexi Casilla showing us just how tall he really is.


Nicky Punto is in need of some serious laxatives! Constipation is nobody's friend.


I guess he's showing us where it hurts. Thanks, Nicky. Thanks A LOT.


Reaching out for help with his "problem".


I've got better solution, Nicky!

Double Dose...

Oh where or where to start? Do I start with the fact that I'm beginning to become less and less of a Livan Hernandez fan every time he goes out and pitches? Maybe if he could, I don't know, win a game, I might not want to dislike him so much.

Kudos though to Kevin Slowey for not only pitching as well as we all know he can, but also for swinging that bat and making Milwaukee Brewers look super retarded for walking Mike Lamb (who has a tendancy to get out) just so that they can face Slowey. Brillant move on their part. I really didn't mind seeing Kevin bat in that inning, nor did I mind watching him get 2 RBI's! I'm not going to lie, I squealed like a little girl at a Hannah Montana concert.It was a great sight! I like interleague play...mainly because I get to see my pitchers bat. It's hillarious...especially when Glen Perkins bats...he hasn't batted since he was freshman in high school and oh my, did he look like it when he stepped into the batters box.

I felt bad for Joe Nathan on Saturday night...I only watched about 3 total innings of the game (and listened to the last two innings) because I was in transit from my parents house. I think Joe Nathan wanted me to watch him pitch that night (because they were in the Navy; Joe Nathan + Navy jerseys = YUMMY!) Thankfully, even though Joe Nathan gave away the save, the Twins still came back to win the game with force. I was so happy for Cuddy! Pinch hitting and then getting a "triple" homerun. That was awesome to do to the Brewers!

I was hopeful for a win yesterday. Scott Baker did amazing, and I still love him even though he gave up the go-ahead 2-run homerun. Though he didn't do amazing things with his bat like Kevin did, he still managed to get 4 strikeouts in one inning (yep, I'm not sure how you would score that since "technically" Fielder's strikeout was K-WP, but yet he went to first because of the WP...maybe you just wouldn't "circle" the out. If anyone knows, feel free to share your knowledge of information that I lack.) I think the players go in shifts of who they are going to give run support to on a per-game basis. Friday 10-2, Kevin Slowey, Saturday 9-4, Scott Baker, and yesterday (Sunday) 2-3, Scott Baker. I think the Twins should have found a way to get 8 runs! Yesterday the umps did make some crap calls though. I didn't like the umpire ignoring Brendan Harris' request for time and the ump letting the pitcher throw when the batter was not looking or paying attention. Hi, didn't someone die from being struck with a line drive? Couldn't something like a 90+ MPH fastball possibly having the same effect if the batter were struck with it? (Yes, I understand that they wear helmets, but there are always accidents.)

Poor Brendan. I sympathize with you. I do!

I do enjoy the fact that because Nick Blackburn feeling sore, the pitching rotation has now shifted. (PS, if anyone wants free tickets to Wednesdays game...upper level near the family section...let me know ASAP! I have 6 tickets for sure that I won't be able to use.) I get to see Kevin Slowey pitch on Wednesday, which thrills me. I enjoy watching him close though, so seats near the bullpen (for pregame warm up time) are in order. Screw my free tickets.

Enjoyable picture of the day (it's sad that Joe is as tall as the man fielding the ball from the knees up.):

A Free Lunch and A Free Shave!?

**UPDATE** The Baseball gods have listened...Juan Rincon is being cut loose from the Twins. His locker was cleared out today and he left the field before reporters got there. YAY!!!
Go here for the story.

I've decided that some of the Twins players are starting to look a little "scruffy". I am nominating a few of them to find razors to be friends with and to get quickly aquainted with said razors. You will learn to love them.Nick, hunny...you did good, but your face looks prettier when it's clean. STOP trying to be like Joe Mauer.Cuddy...how does your wife put up with the "occasional" shave. You can grow facial hair...and quickly. Maybe you should get two razors for those 5 o'clock shadows that seem to appear frequently when you are around. Everyone will appreciate it more. Jason Kubel...'nuf said. When doesn't he need to meet a razor?!?!Last but not least...Joe Mauer. Joe, I'm not going to lie...I'm not your biggest fan, but honestly don't shave. I like the scruff on you. It looks hot. You're the only one who I would recommend breaking your razor to.

******
So I've been contemplating whether or not free tickets are worth me having to sit by and hang out with my co-workers for two night in a row. And not just a few co-workers, but many many co-workers. What ever will the think when I take pictures like this:Or look like a "stalker" with taking pictures...:Good thing for empty seats in the Metrodome...I will have to hope and pray for A LOT of empty seats to move to.

Ahh...the bullpen. How I love thee...(minus Juan Rincon).

Blackburn to the Rescue!

So I think my psychic abilities went into play yesterday when blogging. I said that I had hoped Nick Blackburn would pitch well and even allow me to see Joe Nathan in the process. I got to see Joe Nathan! (Partially because Dennys Reyes tried to ruin the game and the win AGAIN for Nick Blackburn) I think Joe Nathan is like a drug…I must have been going through major withdrawal because not seeing him since June 4th felt like an eternity. I was feigning for Joe Nathan.
I was elated last night with the win. It was a very well deserved and well needed win in the score books. Blackburn pitched very well and the boys even produced good consecutive hits (something they couldn’t do against Sabathia). I am hopeful that this is just one in MANY consecutive wins. My roommate is a fan of the Brewers (yes, I know, they make me want to vomit too) and he was saying how they have been on a losing streak too and needed to start winning. I told him that they needed to get those wins last night and tonight because come Friday-Sunday, the Twins are going to win against them. I think they are done playing Minnesota nice and are ready to kick the Brewers into oblivion.
I can’t wait until Friday’s game. I am far too excited to see Kevin Slowey and the rest of the Twins pitchers bat in the games vs. the Brewers. We don’t get to see this sort of thing every day, so one must take enjoyment in it when it finally comes upon us. Kevin, Glen, and Scott. Batter’s up! Just remember boys, think like piranhas. We don’t need YOU to get homeruns…just on base. Walks work just as effectively as hits too in order for you to reach first base. Plus with a walk…no running is involved.

I’ve decided that we should all play a little game that I’m going to call, “Who’s that Scott Baker?” It’ll be like Let’s Make a Deal, except you’ll just have to try and figure out whose booty is in the picture…I like to refer to taking pictures of players booty’s as “Scott Baker-ing it” since it all started (me taking pictures of Twins/Wild players bootys) with Scott Baker. Study up…there will be a test. Here is our first victim:

Takers? Let me know your guesses!
In other FANTASTIC news…it looks like Juan Rincon might actually be the pitcher put on the chopping block when it comes to making a cut to bring up a position player. I couldn’t be more thrilled, but I’m sure that selfish bastard is going to tell the Twins that he doesn’t want the assignment to Triple-A Rochester, and that he wants to be a free agent. Who is the world is going to want you, Juan Rincon?!? Seriously, maybe you should just consider retiring right now. I know that in “normal” jobs, you can’t sip vodka all day…unless you work at a bar…but you’re just going to have to man-up and get a real job. So sorry! (I think all this hostility toward Juan Rincon started last year when he was rather rude to me…on multiple occasions. I just developed dislike toward him, and it hasn’t gotten any better in the course of the off-season either. Maybe if he would have bucked up and been nice like say, Jesse Crain or Adam Everett, I might be a little sad to see him go, but nope! His lack of pitching skills this year has left me wishing I would slit my own wrists rather than watch him screw up yet another game we could have won.)

Is this Seattle?

With all this rain and losses in baseball, I'm beginning to think I live in Seattle and cheer for the Mariners.Here's the new Kevin Slowey and Joe Mauer. They now play for the Mariners. Guess the hometown hero is no longer in our "home" town.So I have now made myself as depressed thinking about Kevin Slowey and Co. playing for another team about as depressed as these losses are making me. **starts humming to herself "Praying for Sunny Days"**
Okay, I'm back. What to say about last night. We lost. On the bright side, we didn't lose horribly bad, Juan Rincon didn't pitch, Matty Guierrer didn't want to be part of the "bad pitcher club" anymore, and Scott Baker was amazing in his 7 innings. (The Twins' longest since Kevin Slowey's complete game on May 29!) It's unfortunate that our bats weren't making any dents in the Indians outfield; and it's unfortunate that Go-Gomez and Brendan Harris had to have slip ups in the wet field. But, we can't blame the field being wet for our loss. The Indians only managed to score 1 run, for crying out loud! ONE RUN!!! We couldn't sting a pair of hits together to do anything agasint C.C. Sabathia. I used to like Sabathia, mainly because his name was fun to say (and also partly because he was such a great pitcher), but now...NOW, I despise him and his great pitching. Hey, C.C., at least Scott Baker makes amazing, unintentional, catches to get outs! Did you do that last night? I don't think so!
I've decided that the Twins need to put together a winning streak so that I can stop ranting and complaining about the bad news of losing. I don't like losing, and I don't like it when my teams (Twins and Wild) go on LONG losing streaks. I KNOW they can do better than this!!
I frequently offer to "sleep" with Joe Mauer if he gets hits...I might have to offer up to some others (haven't decided who), and only give them options of getting home runs to "sleep" with me. Cuddy, watch out. I'm coming for you, I think!!
I did enjoy Go-Gomez's spin around move to avoid getting hit. Maybe he should have taken one for the team though...got on base.And yes, Brendan, I am as upset about the fact that NO ONE could get any kind of "run producing" hits last night too!


Tonight...Nick "I Want to Look Like Joe Mauer" goes up against the Tribe. COME ON, NICK! WIN US A GAME! Preferably in a way for me to see Joe Nathan pitch as well. I have faith that Nick is going to pull through for me with this request.

calm after the storm

I have decided to look toward the positives of the Twins vs. Chicago series.

Positives:

1. We no longer have to play in Chicago this year.

2. Glen Perkins and co. wore the navy jerseys yesterday. (I think Glen likes the navy ones the best too...Glen, we like you for that!)

3. Nick Swisher is the devil, so that's why we lost. His helmet/hat just hides the horns on his head. Just ask Those Girls if he is or not. They'll agree.

4. Matt Macri getting at bats (okay, so this really isn't necessarily a positive from the Twins vs. White Sox series, but I don't have much else.)

5. We now get to play in Cleveland and watch Scott Baker do this: (thank you, Scott Baker!)Other than those 5 reasons, I am exhausted for "positives" of the Twins/White Sox series. Twins open tonight in Cleveland against the Indians. No Jason Tyner to "homeboy" it for during the games, and no rants about the Twins from Tyner.
I'm hoping for a win tonight. I figure maybe the Twins won't play "Minnesota nice" with the tribe, since they won their last game against Detroit. We always seem to just hand over those games. Don't give this one away boys!!
It looks like Mike Redmond AND Joe Mauer are both in the lineup tonight. Apparently after Kubel and Monroe couldn't produce and get us anywhere in the past few games, Gardy is going to give Patch (Mike Redmond) a shot to show us his skills as a DH. Hopefully he'll be the great clutch hitter than Gardy is hoping for and that the Twins need right now.
Tonight: Can the Twins rebound and produce off of C.C. Sabathia? Only time, and bats (hits off of those bats) will tell. Can our bullpen show us that they can go back to the days of joy, when they weren't sucking and giving up about a gazillion runs? Again, only time will tell. I might have to start a petition soon (if we don't get some winning games with save opportunities). It's going to be called "Let Joe Nathan Pitch, Even If His Save Count Does Not Depend On It." Anyone willing to sign it with me?

In some non-Twins news, I have found out the Branko Radivojevic is not going to be playing for the Wild next season. He's apparently going to be playing in Russia. It's sad news that I am forced to report, but I guess there might be more hope for him in Russia at getting playing time and compensation. I do wish him all the best luck there and will miss his pretty face next season!

Walks will haunt?!?!

Crying out loud, if you're a MN Twins pitcher, maybe you should consider intentionally walking Nick "giant jackass pinata" Swisher instead of risking the chance of being like other MN Twins pitchers and giving him a homerun. Nick Swisher doesn't hit home runs off of the Twins, the Twins give him homeruns.
We might have had a chance at this game, until Jesse Crain decided he wanted to be like Glen and give him a home run.

More updates to come as my frustration grows...

Update: Matty Guierrer is now even letting me down. Way to go, Matty. Way to give up our lead and hand over ANOTHER HOME RUN TO A STUPID WHITE SOX BATTER! (deep breath) It's not Matty's fault...he just wanted to be like every other Twins pitcher (minus Joe Nathan). Poor, poor Matty Guierrer. He at least took my advise and walked Nick Swisher. Now the Twins are dependant on Brian Bass. God help us.

Again, more updates as frustrations grow...

Well, I think going into the bottom of the 8th, down by two, that maybe they should just waive those white flags and just let the White Sox have the game. It might be a little less embarassing this way. Think about it, boys.

Juan Rincon makes me want to drink...

So I've decided to invent a *new* drinking game. It's called, lets take a drink every time a Twins pitcher **cough** Juan Rincon **cough**, gives up a run. Don't like that? How about, every time a Twins player makes a half-assed attempt to field a play **cough** Delmon Young **cough**. Or Nick Swisher such a giant jackass that needs to become a bullseye for me to throw darts at.See! Proof that he makes a GREAT target!

I feel bad for Kevin Slowey. His parents were at the game yesterday, and he didn't do too good. I think he was nervous, but also I think some of our defense was quite lacking. It didn't seem like Kubel or Young were making the kinds of plays I KNOW they can make. Instead they sort of looked like I would in the field. Half-assed effort. I found myself saying to the TV numerous times, "Cuddy would have made that catch Kubel!" I shouldn't have to say that to the TV. Kubel should just amaze me with his skills in the field. It's no wonder he's a DH, and not a position player. I understand Gardy's reasons now.

I really wanted to throw something at the TV however when Nick Swisher came up to the plate. He's such an arrogant ass he makes me want to puke in my mouth (yes, I know, that's gross). I can't stand him. I think I dislike him even more than I dislike Manny Ramirez, and believe me, I don't like Manny very much either.

I liked the ideas for how the boys could gain back some points with us fans that Those Girls came up with. For the puppies in the dugout...I have a candidate for that position. His name is Guillermo. He even snorts for your pleasure!

Hopefully today will be a little less mind numbing. There is a good chance we won't have to endure the painful pitching of Juan Rincon (since he helped the White Sox, 10-run us yesterday) which is always good news. I am in desperate need of Joe Nathan. Not that I get to watch the game, I just miss hearing his name and knowing that he is about to make me think that he wants to blow his save opportunity, just to bedazzle me later by making an amazing out. Well we all know that Joe Nathan appearances wouldn't make a good drinking game...Lord knows we haven't seen him enough this year. Way to go boys, deprive me of Joe Nathan. This is almost as bad as the Twins ridding us of Jason Bartlett (yes, I am still bitter). Do you think the Rays would give us him back and take Delmon Young back...heck, I'll even throw in Juan Rincon, FOR FREE! They can just have him.